Friday, June 08, 2007


Little more than six months lie before me before I hit the third decade. Your twenties, people assure me, are the time for having fun, for getting the crazy out of your system, for 'living a little'.
I think I've done a couple of important things (get a degree, build a career, learn how to make pancakes), and I seem to have ticked off what most lists on the internet hold vital (visit another country, kiss a boy, maybe, like, have sex omg!!!!). But I still thought I should check with my near and dear to see if I had anything left to achieve. And apparently, yes, yes I do.

1) Sky diving. Now I have to say, I don’t really see what the entire point of this is. I suspect it’s a little bit of population control, or Darwinism in action. In fact, I think it’s a government plot to reduce superannuation. Yeah. A conspiracy. Damn the Man.
2) Drink absinthe - I have a feeling absinthe is like the 60s. If you remember drinking it, then you probably made the whole thing up. If you think you never drank it, but do recall this night where you made great friends with a magic rhino who wore tapshoes…well yes, you may have drunk absinthe.
3) Get married in Vegas - because we all want to be a little bit Britney.
4)Break a bone - does it have to be one of my own? Can I maybe combine this one with number 1 or 2?
5) Have a song written for/about me - going to have to go hang out with music school dropouts, aren't I? I can drink absinthe with them, and they'll write a song about the fish in my eyes, and the way my blue hair sambas in the light from the dairy.
6) Read ‘War and Peace’. I can do this while I am recuperating with my broken bone.
7) Imitate ‘Sex and the City’. I’m choosing to interpret this as owning at least one pair of Manolos or Jimmy Choos. Thanks for the heads up, Felix.
8) Have a third child for Australia - The Federal Treasurer, Peter Costello, urged Australians last year to do their "patriotic duty" and have "one [child] for your husband, and one for your wife, and one for the country. Well…as long as its for Australia. (Does that mean I can sue Australia for child support?)
9) Go to a life drawing class - yes, what indeed could be more young, fun, or crazy than drawing nude stick figures?
10) Climb Everest - ok, fairly sure there is someone out there with a death wish for me. Not only have I never climbed anything higher than the steps in an Imax theatre, the only safe window for climbing Chomolungma is in May, and I hit the big three o in January. Add to that the cost (nearly $100,000 ) and my inability to recognise the difference between a crevasse, a crampon, and a karabiner, and I think I can safely write this one off.
11) Shave your head. (What's with the Britney, people?)

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